We are a result of our past experiences. I think that we all get that. And by now we also understand that if we release our past and live in the present, then we could create some serious happiness. But we don’t. Why not? Because we need our stories to be validated and the past provides validation.

Often the root cause of what prevents us from being happy isn’t obvious, which is why this month I am challenging you to dig a little deeper. Think about who you may still be punishing for their past behavior. Who in your life are you still poking at and triggering so that they have to feel pain since they caused you pain? Be honest with yourself.

I know it can be hard to see and, more often than not, it’s because we don’t want to see it. Even though we know, deep down, that it’s stupid to behave like this and that the only person we’re really causing to suffer is ourselves, we continue to do it. We operate on autopilot and, because we’ve been doing it for so long, it just feels natural to think and act this way.

But now’s the time to pause and really think about it. Feel it. And then STOP IT!!

My husband once told me, “I can only apologize so many times for the past. I cannot change it. All I can do is be better now.” Where the hell did this young grasshopper come from? At first I was mad at him for his wisdom because I wanted to continue subtly punishing him for not being as mature as I thought he should be in the beginning of our relationship. After all, I was the one who had to take on running our household, raising our daughter and adding structure to our lives because he was so damn lazy and immature… or at least these were the stories I told myself! But the truth is, I took on these things because I chose to, and then got angry with him for not making the same choices as me. Now I can see what an obvious story this was, but I wasn’t able to until he made the statement. (Yes, this is a couple of years ago. My ego needs you to know that! LOL)

So I encourage you to do the work; look for the stories from the past that you’re clinging to and then peel back the layers to find out what it is that they validate for you. Then, release them and FREE YOURSELF! I know it’s not always easy to see our own habits, so I invite you to schedule a session if you need me to help call you on your shit—lovingly, of course.

Mantra: I Love this moment